"This game is like attaining a state of Nirvana, within Nirvana" - A quotation predicted to appear in a 2009 game review

When an audience saw a reel of film projected onto a backdrop for the very first time, they were so taken with the reality of the illusion that they ran, panicked and screaming, to the back of the theatre. The moving image was that of a train rolling into a station; towards the camera, and, in turn, the mass of people in its path of motion. To them, it all but barreled through the screen.

If you frequent games press outlets upon the eve of a tentpole release, where thousands of smelly nerds wear down that F5 key at 11:59 for the long awaited review, you already know the likely outcome: Being told that game X will transcend review scales, be the best of all time, make the previous hyperbole darling a moot point, and redefine the gaming landscape, of course.
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She reaches out with that slender, delicate hand and evaporates the danger before it takes its usual toll. You seemingly fall to your death, yet she’s right there to pull you up and away from the corrosive depths. The motions are there: rhythmic platforming, daring combat, all the stumbles and spills, too. But death, in the traditional sense, never greets our princely hero. Continue »

The divide between initial imagination and concluding execution is broad and full of obstacles. Some of the most memorable avenues are the early, simpler ones: re-enacting old films from a pile of Lego blocks, hammering out a dishevelled concoction of wood and string, and then, much to the grief of those who have to listen to it, playing the damn thing like a real guitar. And when dreams grow, from sticking together odds and ends, to more complex pursuits, such as building a videogame or authoring a film, most are scared away when the true requirements of their initial aspiration become apparent. Continue »

They’re bum rushing again; a cascade of gnawing, screaming, snarling, sicken bodies fly through every open crevasse of a charming little house that has become a barricade of fortitude against the undead. All this because one of our token heroes made a last minute smash and grab for some ammo, broke up the typecast quartet, and was welcomed by a sludge of zombie pheromone vomit to the face. Continue »

Like kids in a sandbox entwined in an ego arms race, quarrelling over whose sandcastle is bigger, we’re witnessing the same contention epitomized by a videogame pissing match of measurements. Resistance 2 has a penchant for being the biggest, and while it certainly achieves a lofty goal of blowing the scale up and out, the success isn’t en masse. Continue »

• Resistance 2
• Little Big Planet
• Banjo Kazooie Nuts and Bolts
• Red Alert 3
• EndWar
• Left 4 Dead
• Shaun White
• Naruto: The Broken Bond
• Prince of Persia

‘Tis the season, says Soviet Santa. Expect those reviews within the next few weeks. And while you’re bored, check out our twitter for artefacts from the internet, among other things: twitter.com/OnlytheGames

When folks versed in their good book go out to preach the word, they don’t want to hear about a different book that you might adhere to. Tell the gallivanting doorbell sermon that you’d like to discuss the nature of their beliefs and yours – rather than them telling you how unquestionably right they are –  the look on their faces will then turn from being bright as the Sunday afternoon, to harsh as a wicked storm.

Now, plenty of gamers subscribe to their games as resolutely as the millions enamoured with their untouchable beliefs, and if you show an inkling of opening discussion over that which they love religiously, the diatribe is heated, quick, and cruel. But rarely is the scorn against your words. Rather, it will probably be against the number by which you sum your praise and criticism of the game. Continue »